This time of year seems to take everything that's otherwise normal, everything we're used to, and completely turn it on its head. People suffer from a type of depression specifically related to this one season, everyone grabs their thickest boots that actually serve no purpose other than to give people like me something to laugh at, and they tune into The Weather Channel, taking any inkling of something that isn't scorching heat and telling all their friends to join them in building a snowman.
I love winter.
About a week and a half ago, I drove north on I-85 leaving Atlanta. I was supposed to drive south. As I headed further away from the city and closer to South Carolina, the rain became sleet. The sleet soon became very, very light snow flurries. The kind of snow flurries that melt the moment they land. The kind of snow flurries that you only see in the South, because it's just not cold enough here long enough to sustain anything.
And that's what's so funny to me.
I'm hearing multiple reports right now that the possibility of snow is real in parts of Florida. I can't help but laugh at how excited everyone will be to see snow fall from the sky for no more than thirty seconds before it's gone as soon as they can turn to their friends and share a wonderfully stupid grin.
Meanwhile, in the midwest...
Dozens of people have died in auto accidents and other unfortunate mishaps related to a horrible cold snap trouncing the midwestern region of the country. Wind chills have brought temperatures to, get this, fifty-two below zero in parts of North Dakota, and numerous states are about to exhaust their annual snow removal budget within the week.
But hey, wouldn't it be cool if we could all build a snowman this Saturday? Do you think they'll close local businesses?
Do you think Florida will declare a state of emergency like others have? I don't.
But that's what's so god damn fun about winter. Sure, it's a nice change to the sweltering inferno that is Florida from March to December, but let's just call it quits at the point where you have to turn on the heat in the car. Snow? Maybe next year.
Friday, January 8, 2010
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Crist already declared a state of emergency for the farmers in the central part of the state. The orange harvests as well as the strawberry harvests are being threatened.
ReplyDeleteFurther more it hasn't snowed here since 1977. And the chance of it snowing in Tampa are less than in Spring Hill because Tampa is a few degrees warmer. AND even if it did snow, it would snow in the morning and be completely gone by 11a.m.
Suck it up, Florida, it's in the thirties, not the negatives. It'll be back in the fucking sixties by Thursday. The rest of the country? Not so lucky.
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