USF's Sounds of Cooper Hall

Dubbed by this USF student as the "epicenter of weird", Cooper Hall, home to USF's english department, Subway, and a litany of other odd things sits conveniently between the school's library and Burger King. Its array of picnic tables, benches, and concrete facades to sit on make it one of the best places on campus to congregate between classes. It's time we salute this building, which looks older than the state of Florida itself, and what better way to do it than with an audio tribute celebrating its most colorfully bizarre characters.

Now, for the first time, you can purchase the first of The University of South Florida's salutatory series, The Sounds of Cooper Hall. Enjoy quintessential Cooper Hall sounds such as:

"You Saw a Blue Uncircumcised Penis?" "No, no, it was circumcised!"

"And Like, Only White Anglo-Saxons are Worthy..."

"Just a Friend", performed by twelve shouting Theta Chi brothers

A Girl Speaking What Appears to be Middle English in a Condescending Parent-to-Child Like Tone in a Thick European Accent

And more!

For the low, low price of $14.95, you get USF's Sounds of Cooper Hall on compact disc or digital download. Call now and get a bonus gift! In addition to these great tracks, you'll also get a very special introduction performed by the Socrates Sophist Group, a group of philosophy majors who take off their shoes and stand on tables in a supposed effort to bestow one half semester's worth of philosophical wisdom non philosophy majors could only dream to possess. You'll get these great hits, a special introduction, and, if you call within the next fifteen minutes, we'll even throw in the best of The Cooper Hall Crazies: Ten Nonsensical Prayers, Sermons, and Speeches as performed by only the most evangelical of Cooper Hall's quirky patrons.

BUT WE'RE NOT FINISHED

All of this can be yours for the low, low price of $14.95, BUT, be caller number four and you'll also receive:

A black tank top
A cowboy hat
A knife
A puppy
And a copy of USF's Big Book of Bull Puns- Un-believ-a-BULL-y clever reading for every USF student!

A must have for all Cooper Hall patrons! Order now!